Do they try to make you feel guilty?

[thehiddenx]

Well, Christmas was good this year... hope it was for everyone else here as well. Since I've been planning my trip for a while, my family knows all about it, and I had a lot of relatives asking me questions about my plans. Well, everyone is trying to make me feel guilty about going away for a long period of time, and it's really starting to bother me. I mean... I know you shouldn't let anyone influence you out of persuing your dream, but if you get negative feedback enough, it really starts to sink in and get to you.

My brother and his fiance are getting married in May, and they keep bringing up the fact that I won't be there at their wedding if I go on my trip. They keep saying, "Can't you wait until _after_ we're married to leave?" But I wanted to leave in March... staying just for them would entail me working at a substandard job for several more months just so that I can be around for one day in May (even though I genuinely would like to be there, but you have to put yourself first, right??).

My Grandmother keeps saying how much she'll miss me if I'm gone for that long. She keeps saying, "Well who will do this" or "who will do that" if I'm not there to do it. You know... the typical Grandmother routine... you're there for her, you know. ;-)

My dad doesn't want me to go because he thinks I'm shirking responsibility and that I shouldn't just travel aimlessly for half a year or more.

My mom thinks it's too dangerous (what with terrorism and war and all), and she also keeps mentioning how empty the house will be without me there.

And then everyone keeps saying that if I'm gone for so long, no one will recognize me when I get back... "You'll be a different person! No one will know who you are anymore!"

So... it all gets very frustrating. I mean, I want to go, but I value my family as well. Plus, the thought of leaving behind friends for a long period of time... it makes me wonder if I'll even have any friends to come back to at all, or if they will all have just moved on by then. Has anyone else had to go through this type of thing? I'm just curious... Christmas is a nice family get-together, where your family can all get together and badger you as a group. How fun!!

Needless to say, I'm having more doubts again....

~Seth~

[Kim]

Do not have doubts-seriously, if we had of caved into everything, we would have never gone and it would have been the worst thing we could have done.

We both worked at the same place, a company that paid extremely well and was just all round fantastic. Every day for months before, we heard from our boss (a good friend of ours) how we were so dumb to leave and quit, why would we want to go to Europe, that we would never last more than a week.

We missed 2 wedding while we were away and everyone was complaining before we went about how we wouldn't be there etc.

I freaked out right before we left-the usual "Oh god, we are quitting great jobs, giving up our apt., how can we afford this, what will we do when we come home etc."  Crying, the whole drama queen etc.

It lasts until you get off the plane. Then you are saying, "Damn, I was an idiot to even consider not coming!"

Funny, how when you come back you don't even remember that stuff.

We now have other good jobs, a new place to live, the weddings are long forgotten and my old boss is saying how HE wants to go to Europe.

It's an experience of a lifetime-there is not much that can measure up to it. You can live your life and not take any risks, which is fine, you will never have many highs and lows. Or you can walk the line and take risks in order the get the high of the highs and the lowness of the lowness.

Personally, that's what I can living life!

K